Wednesday, September 14, 2011


1. Law of Mechanical Repair After your hands
become coated with grease, your nose will begin
to itch.
 Law of Gravity Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when
dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

 Law of Probability - The probability of being
watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

 Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong
number, you never get a busy signal and someone
always answers.
6. Variation Law -   If you change lines (or traffic lanes),
the one you were in will always move faster than the
one you are in now (works every time).

 Law of the  Bath When the body is fully immersed
in water, the telephone rings.

 Law of Close Encounters - The probability of
meeting someone you know increases dramatically
when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

 Law of the Result When you try to prove to
someone that a machine won't work, it will.

 Law of Biomechanics The severity of the
itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

 Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any
event, the people whose seats are furthest from the
aisle, always arrive last They are the ones who will
leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or
the toilet and who leave early before the end of the
performance or the game is over.  The folks in the
aisle seats come early, never move once, have long
gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of
the performance.  The aisle people also are very surly folk.

 The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup
of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something
which will last until the coffee is cold.

 Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2
people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

 Law of Physical Surfaces The chances of an
open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a
floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost
of the carpet or rug.

 Law of Logical Argument Anything is possible
if you don't know what you are talking about.

 Brown's Law of Physical Appearance If the
clothes fit, they're ugly.
17. Oliver's Law of Public Speaking A closed
mouth gathers no feet.

   Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy
 - As soon as you find a product that you really like,
they will stop making it.

 Doctors' Law If you don't feel well, make an
appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get
there you'll feel better..  But don't make an
appointment, and you'll stay sick.

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