humor and wisdom
· I tried to catch some fog. I mist.·
When chemists die, they barium.·
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.·
A soldier who survived mustard gas and
pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
· I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid.
· How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.·
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went.
· This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club,
but I'd never met herbivore.·
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.·
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play onwords.·
They told me I had type A blood, but it was a type-O.·
This dyslexic man walks into a bra.·
PMS jokes aren't funny, period.·
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.·
A cross-eyed teacher lost her job because she couldn't control herpupils?·
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.·
What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back fourseconds.·
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hitme!·
Broken pencils are pointless.·
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? Athesaurus.·
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.·
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.·
I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.·
All the toilets in London police stations have been stolen.
Police say they have nothing to go on.·
I took the job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.·
Velcro - what a rip off!·
Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.
"SMILE"DAE A HUV TAE?