Thursday, June 19, 2014

Rational Thoughts

I'm not saying let's go kill all the stupid people. I'm just saying let ' ​s 
remove all the warning labels and let the problem work itself out.
I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much
faster now.
You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands. If they are
holding a gun, she's probably angry.
You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone?
That's common sense leaving your body.
I don't like making plans for the day because then the word "premeditated"
gets thrown around in the courtroom.
I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row
I decided to change calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim.
I feel much better saying I went to the Jim this morning
Dear paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers; if you
find one, what's your plan?

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