Monday, March 12, 2012


           Lovers of words (“you can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish”
or… “I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me”.etc.)

· To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

· When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

· A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

· When the smog lifts in Los Angeles , U.C.L.A.

· The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.

· The batteries were given out free of charge.

· A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

· A will is a dead giveaway.

· If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

· With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

· Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat miner.

· You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

· Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.

· A boiled egg is hard to beat.

· When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

· Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

· Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

· If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

· A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

· In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.

· When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds

· The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

· He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

· Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

· When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

 Acupuncture: a jab well done.


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